Happiness...

small group girls at our winter retreat. Love them!

She was stuck in the snow!

Poppa Baker with the guitar

Ceecees first haircut! She did so well!

umm......

Usually during this time of the year I am just kind of down. The weather is yuck, and at times I feel like my spirit reflects the world around me instead of the Promise that I belong to.

This year feels differently. Something God is really kicking my butt on is my tendency to react. If a situation goes my way, I react with happiness. If something or someone doesnt meet my expectations, my response is one of indifference, hostility, or woundedness (is that a word?). TOO MUCH OF ME IS WAITING TO REACT TO THIS WORLD. It's like I'm waiting to live the life God has called me to depending on if everyone else is living theirs.

My Christian walk has become a reactive one. Not to God as much as to others.

When I die, and I stand before the Lord...I won't be able to say, "well....she started it" or "this situation didn't work in my favor" or whatever else it is that I tell myself. It's just my holy God, and my miserable self...and He is going to someday hold me accountable for my life REGARDLESS of what has been thrown at me, dealt to me, or said to me.

It's time for me to start living the way my God has called me to, regardless of what goes on around me in the Church, in my friends, in my family. I need, need, need to stop reacting to what is around me and START LIVING FOR WHAT IS INSIDE ME.

And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may PROVE what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God. Romans 12:2